Adultery: not a Taboo anymore in India
Since the very beginning of civilization, we have known marriage to be the most sacred and respected relationship. It is rather considered as a holy bond not only between two people but two families also. Marriage has the highest place in our social system. Since our childhood, we are taught that whatever you do ultimately you must get a good life partner and settle down. Everyone tells you how to be good marriage material because marriage ensures physiological and biological satisfaction for a human being. So we grow up thinking that no matter what ranks, jobs or salaries we achieve if we do not get a good life partner all this will be of no use. Such a big deal is created around marriage that one always fears that they have to stay in the marriage even if they are unhappy in it. But since the world is moving at a fast pace the ever sacred marriage vows are losing their charm. Times have changed and so have the roles of men and women in society. We live in a more liberated world now. We have so many technological tools at our disposal through these we can easily access any information or reach anyplace virtually. The changed scenario has given rise to a well aware, more opinionated and open-minded generation. The expectations are really high and the couples find it difficult to fit into the conservative mould and this leads to failed and broken marriages.
There are two types of marriages – no we are not talking about love and arranged, but the two types of marriages are successful and unsuccessful. If you have loved and then married or married or than loved, what matters is that is your marriage successful? India was a country that was known for long successful marriages, marriages in which the partners have never met or seen each other, long distance marriages and marriages where partners have been decided since childhood. But soon we are pacing towards a nation with high divorce rate and broken marriages. But why? As a modern human being we lack patience and understanding. A small fight can turn into divorce these days. Earlier women felt bound even if they do not want to stay in the marriage, it was difficult for them to walk out because of family pressure, financial insecurity and no job. But women are independent; they have their family’s support so even they find it easier to end the marriage.
Once in an unhappy marriage partner look for peace in the arms of the third person. They feel that a third person can fill the void that has been caused by the unloving partner. This gives rise to adultery and extra marital affairs. The new relationship might offer freshness and passion but there is no guarantee that it will be lasting one. But the question is that Why Adultery is on rise in India? To understand the answer of this question we have to keep in mind the economic make up of our society. Earlier men and women had defined roles i.e. men would earn the bread and women would take care of the house. It was a default setting, no matter what family, education or lifestyle you have. So men and women accepted it. Another factor is that no matter how your in-laws or husband treats you have no option but to stay with them. So women had no financial independence, no freedom and no support to run out in a marriage. They adjusted to everything. On the other hand men were taught that they have to take care of the family, old parents and they can’t do anything to destroy the home. It was also taught to children that their parents are the best judge for choosing a life partner for them. This is how society worked and adultery was a taboo.
Times changed and women became more independent and opinionated. They started stepping out for jobs and education. They realised that they have a say in their life and soon the conflict started. On the other hand men had access to modern outgoing women around them at workplace or elsewhere. Both men and women had high desires from their partners and this has led to unsatisfied marriages. In many cases this results in adultery and infidelity. According to various statistics which include surveys done by Outlook and India Today, more than 50% men and women admit of having flings and affairs. Ashley Madison survey went one point further and said that now in India 76% of women and 61% of men don’t consider infidelity or Adultery as a sin or immoral act. So women have beaten men at the game of acceptance of Adultery. While studies are conducted it has also been revealed that many loose interest in having sex with their partner. All this leads to stress in the relationship and new encounters always excite. So much so that nearly 30% of the divorce cases filed in Metros have Adultery as a component, sometimes brazen and other times as a lingering doubt.
We can’t put the tag of cheater on only men anymore. Nowadays women are equally adulterous and are having extramarital affairs. The modern women are no longer confined to their homes. They have access to outside world; they have interactions with many men other than their husbands. Today’s women bears no constrain and are not shy to experiment. So it would not be wrong to say that women are as adulterous as men. The percentage to women having affairs outside marriage is increasing. The modern woman wants it all, she is ready to work, take care of the house and have exciting sexual encounters. Applications like Tinder and WhatsApp aid Adultery in current generation, these applications and avenues were not available to the generations of the yore. Also, experts argue that because women cannot be prosecuted for Adultery, this gives them a free license to get involved in such affairs with impunity.
Can adultery be stopped? This is a very tricky question because adultery has no one particular cause. It can happen because of emotional imbalance in marriage, sexual dissatisfaction, ego clashes and many such reasons that can be cured by laws. Infidelity is an individual question. Although there are laws that take care of the adultery in marriage, but no law can teach morality to anyone. In my opinion, this trend is going to increase rather than reverse.
In my view, we all must understand to our partners need. Whether men or women, respect your partner’s desires because adultery and broken marriages have the worst effect on innocent children of such partners. If you are battling adulterous spouse in your marriage and want to get rid of her, but don’t know how? I suggest you to contact me in person for seeking advice on these matters.
If you want to know the ways to prove adultery, I would suggest you go through this article how to prove adultery
If you wish to know the legal position if your spouse is in adulterous relationship, I suggest, you go through Divorce Adultery
If you have any query related to gender biased laws join SahodarWhatsapp Groups by sending Whatsapp message “Subscribe” to Sahodar Trust No. 9811850498